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Title: |
Just Another Saturday |
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Author/pseudonym: |
alyjude |
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Rating: |
PG (aly turning red with shame) |
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Pairing: |
J/B, N/S |
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Category: |
Humor (subjective, remember?) First time |
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Date: |
August 26, 2000 |
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Status: |
Old, but made new again. See Notes |
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Series/sequel: |
No series, no sequel |
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Archive: |
Yes, please |
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Other webpage: |
www.skeeter63.org/k9kennel |
(PS: I also don't make a dime from this stuff. What, you thought the world would pay me for this? Get real)
NOTES: This story reposting is a result of several conversations on saficdic, the Sentinel Adult Fiction Discussion List. The wonderful readers and authors inspired me to go back and look at the crap I first produced! This story was originally posted on sxf in October or November of, are you ready? {{{{1998}}}}!!! It was never archived and until now, has never appeared at The Kennel. If it sounds familiar, then you've been here too long!! :)) It was orginally posted with the title of:
"DANGLING" and represented my very first multi-part story. I posted one part each night until I completed it. I had no way back then of posting multi-part stories all at once.
NOTE2: I have, with the wonderful help of my beta, Winds-of-Dawn (thank you, wod!) gone back and made corrections to my grammar etc, and a few updates (like adding in Tiger Woods <g>). I also moved the time of the story from a few months after Spare Parts to a several weeks after Sentoo/2. But because I wanted to preserve the mindset of the author (um, that would be me) I have left the story basically as is and maintained the PG rating. Back then I had ABSOLUTELY no idea how to write a same sex love scene. So - NO SEX. But you guys have imaginations, so use them! LOL!
Warnings: When you have Jim Ellison locked in your basement with Blair Sandburg, don't EVER interrupt. {{{{EVER}}}}. Damn, Ellison is touchy.
Summary: Wherein Jim Ellison and Blair Sandburg spend a quiet Saturday at home.
Just Another Saturday
by alyjude
Damn commercials.
Jim Ellison gave brief thought to getting up for another beer, but he was just too comfortable. It was Saturday, he was watching Tiger Woods tear up the seventeenth fairway, and except for commercials - all was right with his world.
He used the mindless hawking of nighttime toothpaste to gaze around his home. And as usual, he stopped looking when he came to his roommate. Somehow, his roamings always ended with Sandburg.
At the moment, Mr. Computer was typing away, his tongue stuck out in concentration and his glasses were perched precariously on the end of his nose. Jim couldn't help the monstrous grin.
The sun was on its way down and a soft breeze rustled through the trees. Summer was on its way out. Autumn was on its way in and Blair's typing seemed to fit right in. Everything was cozy, normal, right.
"Damn."
"Jim?"
"Company, Sandburg."
"Damn. And it was such a nice day too."
Ellison made his way, albeit reluctantly, to the front door and even as he was reaching for the knob, he knew who was on the other side.
Puttin on his best cheerful face, Jim swung the door open.
"Naomi. Good to see you again."
Blair immediately started fumbling with his papers as he pushed his chair back and squeaked out, "Mom?"
Naomi Sandburg swept into the room, arms open wide.
"Sweetie!"
Blair found himself wrapped in billowing silk before he could sputter out an appropriate reply. He glanced at Jim - and really hated the smirk gracing the older man's handsome features.
He found himself held out at arms length and examined closely.
"Blair, honey, you look wonderful. Handsome as ever!"
"Mom, what a surprise. I didn't realize you were in - town."
Naomi released her son and turned to plant a kiss on Jim's cheek. Blair didn't even try to hide his smirk.
"I know, honey. It was a last minute decision, and don't panic, Jim, I'm leaving in the morning and I'm staying at the hotel near the ariport."
"Tomorrow? Uh, mom, we haven't seen each other for months and there's no way you're staying in a hotel, right, Jim?"
"Absolutely, Chief. You're welcome anytime, Naomi, you know that."
"Thank you, Jim and honey, I wish I had more time too, but I'm on my way to New York and my flight leaves at noon."
Blair's disappointment was evident, his face an open book. Naomi continued as if unaware.
"I do have some incredible news, it's the reason I have to be in New York." Naomi glanced from her son to Jim and back again, clearly waiting for someone to ask.
Jim, feeling the one-sided tension, decided to be the one.
"Well, I don't know about you, Chief, but I'll bite. What's the news, Naomi?"
A huge smile lit up Naomi's face and Jim had to blink. Blair. That smile - was Blair.
"I've written a book and it's going to be published."
Blair was stunned. His mother, writing a book?
"That's why New York. My publisher is there, of course, and I have contracts to sign."
Jim noticed how Naomi watched her son and realized that she was nervous. Blair must have felt it too because he stepped forward with a warm smile.
"Gee, mom, that's - great. Really."
Jim had to give Sandburg his due, the man could really put it on when he needed to, but then, so could Jim Ellison.
"This is terrific news, Naomi. We've got to celebrate."
"Jim, that is so sweet, but I only have tonight and I don't want to be any trouble."
Blair had walked back to the table and with shaking hands that only a sentinel would notice, started clearing up and shutting down his computer. Police procedural books were closed and quickly stacked, then carried into his room.
Jim was worried. The topic of publications was still a fresh wound in Blair and one that he'd as yet not discussed with his mother.
"Look, why don't I run to the store, buy a few things, cook a celebration meal, and in the meantime, you two talk, okay?"
Without taking her eyes from Blair's retreating form, Naomi reached out and gave Jim's arm a squeeze.
Blair came back out nodding. "Thanks Jim, that's a - great idea."
"Right, great idea," he muttered as he grabbed his coat and keys.
Naomi turned toward him and smiled her thanks, but it was the look on Blair's face that almost stopped him. He was staring at his mother and Jim could see the hurt swimming around in the sapphire depths.
Without giving it any thought, he stepped over to Blair, dropped a kiss on his cheek and walked out the door.
If he'd have stayed, he'd have seen the puzzled expression on Naomi's face and the total, unadulterated shock on Blair's.
~~<>~<~>~><~>
Blair recovered quickly and knowing his partner as he did, he turned back toward the door and began to count backwards.
"Five --- four --- three --- two --- one."
Jim stepped back into the loft, redfaced and breathing hard. He looked at Naomi.
"Uh, Naomi?"
Then he looked at Blair.
"Uh, Blair?"
Blair stared right back at him and said with a glimmer of the old Sandburg humor, "Got something you want to share, Jim?"
~<~<~<>~<~<~<
Jim stared from one to the other.
Okay, he could deal with this. So what if he'd just kissed Blair.
The two faces with the twin expressions showed no sign of taking a so at face value.
Fine, if this was their reaction to a simple kiss on the cheek, he'd give them something to react to.
Jim went casual.
"Sorry, I forgot these." He reached back into the basket and picked up his sunglasses. He chose to ignore Blair's pointed jerk toward the setting sun.
He smiled at the two, one of his more brilliant smiles, then oh, so casually, patted Blair on the ass.
"Be right back."
As he stepped out into the hall, he stared down at his hand. It was surprisingly - warm.
Humming, he started down the stairs but paused as Blair's voice floated down to him.
"Lucy, you've got some s'plaining to do!"
Jim quickened his steps.
<>~<~<>~>~<>
Back in the loft, Blair was left with his mother.
A woman he hadn't seen in months, and who A) had just seen his male roommate kiss him on the cheek and pat his ass and B) didn't know that Blair was no longer a teaching fellow at the University, that he was, in fact, on his way to becoming a police officer.
Okay, he could deal with this, whatever this was.
Blair turned to face the inquisitor, a large and very casual smile on his face.
First things first. The easiest.
"Mom, I'm going to be a cop."
~<~<>~<~
"Here," Blair took his mother's hand and placed a tall, cold glass of water in it, "Drink this."
She downed it all in one gulp. Her son - a cop.
"Scotch, dear? Would you have any scotch?"
"Mom, come on, the news isn't that earthshattering."
"My beautiful son, an anthropologist and he tells me he's about to become a cop and you don't think that deserves a scotch? And Jim Ellison kissed you on the cheek and patted your ass. Dear, that's two major lifestyle changes."
Blair got up and found the scotch. He poured himself a stiff one, then put it away.
"Now, mom, this is my life and this is what I want to do. My dissertation is a no go and don't ask, because I don't want to discuss it. And as for the ass thing? Well, you watch football, right? That was just - male bonding. And I'm sure he meant to kiss you."
That was his story and was sticking to it.
"That's your story?"
"Mom, trust me - nothing is going on between Jim and me, nothing."
Her expression simply repeated her previous question.
"Mom, it's not a story."
"Blair, honey, it's not like I didn't pick up the vibes the last time I was here. And it's not like I mind - exactly, I mean, not about you being with a man, I hear that. It's the cop part I'm not too thrilled with. Although," her hands were waving in the air, in a perfect imitation of her son, "although, obviously, you now becoming a cop, make my objections to Jim a bit - moot."
Although," she repeated again, her hand punctuating the word, "I realize it is your life and these are your choices and I know Jim will protect you," she looked at her son and smiled. "I'm rambling, aren't I?"
"Yes, a little, but mom, there is nothing....vibes? What vibes? What vibes did you pick up? There are so not any vibes here, I mean," he got up and started to pace, his hands waving in the air and Naomi recognized the signs as a prequel to an anxiety attack.
"....no vibes here, no sir, none, zip, nada, just two friends, partners, what vibes?"
She crossed over to his side and took his waving hand. "Honey, maybe we should meditate together? You're getting a little tense."
Blair recognized that soothing voice and wondered vaguely if that was how he sounded to Jim when he was taking him through his exercises?
"Mom, I'm fine." And did Jim find that voice as nauseating as he found it in his mother?
"Blair, sit down and breathe."
"Naomi," he said firmly. "I am not having a panic attack, okay? I haven't had one in over three years!"
Three years? Wow, since he'd moved in with Jim.
"Three years, Blair? Why that's wonderful, dear. When did you move in here - exactly?"
He could handle this, he could. Once he remember how to breathe and then killed Jim.
"Look, when Jim gets back, you can ask him, what he was ---- what he meant ---- who he meant - to kiss. Okay? He'll tell you - NO VIBES."
He'll be dead of course, but maybe Blair would let him clear the air first. Yeah, clear air, then kill. Excellent plan.
"Hey, mom, maybe we should cleanse the place a bit? A little sage?"
That would fix his wagon.
"Blair, are you denying that you and Jim are a couple?"
What could he say to that?
"Mom, we are so not together, it's like - no, we're not a couple. You've got to get that ass pat out of your mind. It was just male bonding, like I said. Football, huddles, you know."
"That was male - possession, Blair, not bonding."
He was losing. He was telling the truth and was still losing.
"Mom, I'd be the first one to know if Jim and I were - possessing, you know?"
A knock at the door forstalled further conversation and Blair could only wonder how the day could get any worse. Maybe it was Simon. That would do it.
Blair opened the door.
"Simon."
Oh, shit. He couldn't handle this.
~<~<~<>~<~<~~
Before Blair could welcome Simon, Naomi grabbed the large man's arm and pulled him inside.
"Captain Banks, how good to see you again."
She reached up and kissed the surprised man on his cheek.
Way too much cheek kissing going on in this loft today. Okay, Blair could use another cheek kiss from Ellison, as in - turn the other cheek? Ass cheek? Whoa, get a grip, Sandburg.
Naomi was leading the stunned Simon into the living room and Blair froze at her next words.
"Maybe you can tell me what's going on between your detective and my son?"
Matricide, then jail. Peaceful in jail.
"MOM!" He grabbed her away from Simon and started to lead her into his bedroom. "Simon, excuse my mother, she just took one of her own concoctions and it's having a very strange effect on her." He opened his doors and added, looking over his shoulder at Simon, "I'll just get her settled, calm her down a bit," but at that moment, Naomi simply slipped out of his grasp and glided back to Simon.
"Blair Sandburg, I'm ashamed of you! Simon, there is absolutely nothing wrong with me and is it possible that you are even more handsome than the last time we saw each other?"
She once again took the big man's arm and led him to the couch where she sat him down and took the spot next to him.
"So, tell me about Jim and Blair?"
Since working with Blair Sandburg, Simon Banks had become familiar with words like, strange and different, two words that seemed to follow the young man the way he followed Ellison. But today, today went so far beyond strange or different, that Banks had the urge to check his wallet - make sure he was Simon Banks.
On the other hand, he wasn't the Captain of Major Crime for nothing.
"Naomi, it's wonderful seeing you again and may I say, you are even more beautiful than ever?"
Blair, standing behind them, suddenly bent over as if looking for something on the floor.
"Blair, what are you doing?"
He straightened. "Oh, uh, just picking my jaw up from the ground. You know, I think I'll," he pointed to the door, "I think I'll just go outside, see if Jim needs any help - when he gets here. Okay?"
Before either could react, he'd bolted.
~<~<>~>~
Blair ran down the stairs which was a big mistake. He made it down two flights before his body passed his feet. He fell down the last flight and came to rest in a heap at the bottom.
A few moments later, Jim, arms laden with groceries, entered the lobby. He was so wrapped up in thoughts about what Sandburg was going to do to him, that he never heard the tumbling body.
But he felt it, with his foot, which struck the Blairlump. Groceries flew into the air and Jim went down - on Blair.
He expected to hit hard floor, not soft body.
From that point, it only took a moment to catalogue smell, hearing and touch to realize he'd landed on Blair. And that Blair wasn't moving.
Jim scrambled to his knees and did a quick sentinel reconnaissance and immediately breathed a sigh of relief. No broken bones and Sandburg was showing signs of revival.
Blair started to moan and move so Jim placed his hand against the younger man's chest and gently restrained him. "Take it easy, Blair, don't move, you took a nasty spill."
Blue eyes locked with his, blinked, focused.
"You're a dead man, Ellison." The words were barely a whisper, but the intent was clear.
Jim's hand was still resting on Blair's chest and he quickly swatted it away. "I'm fine, Jim, leave me alone."
"Blair, you were out for several seconds, maybe longer. Now stay put or I call an ambulance."
Blair, who'd been struggling to sit up, now dropped slowly back down. "Fine, but you're still a dead man. And did I mention? Simon is currently sitting in your living room, alone with *my*mother, who is grilling him about us. Did I mention that, you schmuck?"
Jim was checking Blair's pupils, which for Blair, looked normal. "So?"
"So? That's all you can say? So? Naomi, thanks to you, you asshole, thinks we're a, you know, that we're - and now she's pumping Simon for information. Simon, you remember him? Our boss?"
Jim straightened, bringing Blair with him and carefully, he got them both up. "Who cares what Simon thinks? Or anyone else for that matter?"
They were standing close, bodies touching, Jim's arm around Blair's waist, giving him support. Blair's hand was on Jim's arm for purchase. "Jim, you've lost it, man." But his breathing was coming with more difficulty as he breathed in Jim's aftershave....
Ellison leaned in closer. "No I haven't. I'm a cop. With great instincts. I often act on those instincts. You got a problem with that, Chief?"
Blair leaned back, staring up at Ellison as if he were a complete stranger. But the glitter in Jim's eyes....
"uh, no, no problem."
"Good, let's get you upstairs."
Keeping his arm around Blair and negotiating the grocery obstacle course, Jim started up the stairs.
~<~>~><~>~
Blair felt every step - in his back. And he was mad. Jim was being too - nice. He hated a nice Sentinel. He bit back his groans, but damn, he knew Jim could sense every wince.
They finally made it to number 307 and Jim got the door open, calling for Simon at the same time.
But Simon didn't hear him, he was busy.
Investigating Naomi's mouth.
And by the looks of it, Naomi was doing a fine job of investigating Simon's mouth at the same time.
Jim looked down at Blair, who looked up at Jim.
Two pairs of almost identical blue eyes made contact.
"So, did you hear about my mother's book?"
"Yeah, great news, Chief."
"Mom!"
Naomi pulled away from the very warm and wonderful embrace, turned her head and blinked at the vision staring at her from the front door.
Her son, in Jim Ellison's arms? She was off the couch in an instant, which unfortunately, caused Simon Banks to almost fall headfirst into the cushions.
"So! There's nothing between you and Jim, isn't that what you said, Blair Jacob Sandburg? And to think, you actually had me believing you. But here you are, in his arms."
Simon wasn't exactly sure what to do. These were - strange circumstances indeed. Should he get up? Follow Naomi? Demand answers of his detectives? He started to rise, but then dropped back down. He wasn't a coward - exactly, but he did believe in never interfering in family affairs. First rule of good police work, if you wanted to stay alive.
He'd watch from the couch, gun at the ready.
Although - come to think of it, why was Blair in Jim's arms?
"Well, Blair, what do you have to say for yourself?" Naomi demanded, hands on hips.
Blair bristled. He catches his mother kissing his boss and she demands an explanation from him?
"I catch you kissing my boss and you want an explanation from me? Are you crazy?"
Realizing what he'd just said, he glanced quickly at their Captain.
"Sorry, Simon, no offense, man."
Simon held up a hand. "None taken, son." Then he gulped and considered using the gun - on himself.
"Blair Sandburg, this is not about me. This is about you and trust and....," her waved toward Jim, "and - him."
Blair decided this had gone far enough. Or maybe ---- not far enough?
"Mom, what do you want me to say? I love the big lug, okay? We were married last week, a small, rather intimate ceremony, we should have invited you, but who knew where you were? And by the way? You'd have just loved it. Very outdoorsy, very natural, very sixties."
He slipped from Jim's shocked grasp and hobbled to the dining room table, using the back of a chair for support.
"Now, I don't want you to think this was a shotgun wedding, I mean, the baby isn't due for months," he turned to Banks, "And Simon, don't worry, the doctor says Jim can work right up to his due date. Of course, he'll be desk-bound, I mean, he can't go running after criminals when he's nine months pregnant, right?"
The stunned expressions on everyone's faces was all that Blair needed.
But he wasn't quite finished.
"Now, you two kids go back to what you were doing, I believe you were discussing investigative techniques, while Jim and I slip into the study and start an investigation of our own." He looked at Jim and held out his hand.
"Shall we - sweetheart?"
Jim was nothing if not quick on his feet. He knew who was in control. He nodded, took Blair's hand, got in close and sliding his other arm back around Blair's waist, he started moving him toward the french doors.
They came this close to succeeding.
"STOP RIGHT THERE, JAMES ELLISON."
James Ellison had taken a lot of orders in his time, but none had had the command of one pissed off mother. He stopped dead.
"All right, what's going on here, Blair? What are you hiding?"
Blair closed his eyes. God, so close.
"Mom - don't panic."
"I hate it when you say that. The last time you said that, you'd been in a car accident, remember? *Oh, mom, don't panic, I'm fine. I was just thrown through the windshield*, wasn't that how you told me?"
Jim's head whipped around. "WINDSHIELD? You were thrown through a WINDSHIELD?"
"Jim, shut up, you're not helping. Mom, I took a little - spill on the stairs. That's all. I'm just fine. And I never said I was thrown through a windshield, I said my backpack was thrown through windshield. I was thrown from the car in the normal way - from the passenger door flying open as the car flew over the cliff."
"Jim, didn't I tell you all his bad luck had nothing to do with working with us? Didn't I tell you that?"
"Simon, no offense, but shut up." Naomi smiled sweetly as she said it and Simon shut up.
Jim was looking aghast, his mouth hanging open. Blair made another decision. Namely that the whole world was going crazy - except him, of course.
"Look, I tripped, slipped and that's all. If you really want to help, mom, you and Simon could go downstairs and retrieve the groceries. They're all over the lobby floor. Please?"
Naomi opened her mouth, closed it, opened it again, but finally, with a sigh, she turned around, grabbed Simon's arm and pulled him up and to the door.
"All right, Blair, but when we come back up with the groceries, you and I are going to talk, is that understood, young man?"
Blair rolled his eyes, but nodded. A moment later, he and Jim were alone.
<>>>><<>><<<<<>
He wiggled out of Jim's grasp, pulled out a chair and sunk down with a slight moan.
"Chief, you're hurt. I think we should take you to Emergency Care."
Blair dismissed the suggestion with a wave of his hand. "No need, just bruised my back, nothing serious. Just sore, I'll live - unless I kill myself first."
Jim reached for the younger man's shirt. "Chief, I thought I was the dead man here?" He smiled gently, "Come on, let me check you out."
He began to lift the shirt over Blair's head, which should have been an easy task, but then, this was most definitely the Sandburg Zone.
First, Blair discovered that he couldn't raise his arms high enough due to the pain, then he discovered he couldn't lean forward far enough, again due to pain, so Jim reached inside the shirt to help, and his watchband got tangled in Blair's hair.
Naturally, Blair tried to move his head away and even more naturally, his earrings somehow snagged an almost invisible thread from his shirt.
"Freeze, Chief. Don't move."
From under the shirt came an angry, muffled retort. "mmthats mmphwhat
phmmfreezemph meanphs"
Jim ignored him. "We can handle this, Sandburg, we're both college graduates. We can figure this out."
"Mm mwhph kimphw, youmph, dickwad."
"Now, Blair, be reasonable. If you killed me now, you'll be trapped in there forever."
"tmpyhoh bmpe mphbk anphy soenfd."
"I know they'll be back any second. Just relax, stay calm and I'll take care of everything."
Using some clever gyrations, Jim soon had his watch free. Jubilantly, he held up his freed wrist and was horrorified at the amount of Blairhair hanging from the clasp of his watch.
"Boy, that must have hurt - and so much hair too. Of course, you've got so much, you won't even miss - these."
"MPPHER! YMPHR THP ONPMP GNMHG BWPHD!"
"That was below the belt, Chief, even for you. And I am not losing my hair!"
"MPHY EARIGMPH!"
"Okay, just a bit more, hold still, I've got it.....," and a few seconds later, "THERE! You're free and both ear and earring are doing just fine!"
Jim managed to get only the shirt, not the undershirt off, revealing a flushed and glassy-eyed Sandburg. His hair floated down, all the shades of mahogany shimmering with the setting sun-and as fingers came up to push the mass of curls from his face, as he looked up at Jim, lips parted to speak, Jim's breath caught and he immediately followed his instincts by leaning down and covering Blair's mouth with his own.
Naomi and Simon naturally chose that moment to walk back into the loft.
~~<<<<>>>>~~
As Naomi and Simon headed downstairs, the two very different people found themselves suddenly shy with each other. Simon watched the graceful moves of the woman in front of him and found himself grinning from ear to ear.
Her voice brought him thudding back to earth.
"Don't they make a perfect couple, Simon?"
"Naomi?"
She turned to gaze back at him. "Oh, come on, you must be aware of how they feel about each other? Why they're so much in love, it hurts to look at them."
"Are you telling me that you believe they really are a couple?"
They'd reached the bottom and were on their knees, picking up the groceries before Naomi finally answered him.
"No, they're not a couple - yet, but soon. Very soon."
Simon reached for a can of tomatoes and gave a disgusted snort. "So, what, we're playing matchmakers? Cupids?"
She paused and straightened up. "Why, yes, I believe we are. Does that bother you? My son and your detective?"
Simon thought about it for a minute. Not an easy road for any same sex couple today, but two cops? Shit. Then he looked at Naomi's glowing face....
"No, it doesn't bother me, Naomi. But it won't be easy for them."
"Nothing worthwhile ever is, Simon. But they'll have you, me, and their good friends. And the world is changing, Simon. Maybe not fast enough, but it is changing."
He could love this woman. He could love her very much. He leaned over and kissed her and she kissed him right back.
They finally parted, gathered up the rest of the groceries and with grins plastered on their faces, started back upstairs. Halfway back, Simon paused.
Blair could become - his son.
"Oh, God."
Naomi put her hand on his arm and smiled sweetly. "Now, Simon, having Jim Ellison as a son-in-law wouldn't be that bad."
"OHDEARGOD."
She patted his cheek and pushed open the front door - and froze.
Simon looked over her shoulder and his eyes widened.
"Simon," she whispered, "Did you hear about my book?"
"No, tell me about it."
~~<<<>>>~~
Considering that he was watching two of his detectives devouring each other, he felt pretty good.
"Aren't they cute, Simon?" Naomi whispered up at him.
Cute was not his word of choice. But he nodded anyway. Cute. He'd have to remember that for later, say, poker night? When he held a losing hand?
In spite of the incredible feeling of using Blair Sandburg's mouth as his new playground, Jim had some of his senses working elsewhere and he realized, finally, that they were no longer alone. With great reluctance, he pulled away.
Just in time to hear Naomi call them cute.
Shit. He'd never live this down. He stood up, his face flushing beet red.
Blair on the other hand, was barely conscious and had this really - dopey smile on his face and his fingers kept reaching for Jim's shirt as Jim kept swatting his hand away.
"Naomi, I can explain this, it isn't what it looks like...."
God, he hadn't used that line since high school and it hadn't work then, either.
Jim's words brought Blair back to earth long enough to dig the hole Jim was working on, a little deeper.
"Yes it is," he said happily. Then he went back to foolishly grinning and reaching for Jim.
Jim gazed down at the dopey object of his affection and said, "Blair, you're not helping here." He turned back to Naomi just as Blair got a hold of his shirt. "Jim? I want more."
Now Jim Ellison knew what it was like to be stuck between that rock and the hard place.
And he was hard. He looked at that face, staring up at him, eyes glassy, grinning like an idiot and he almost gave in right then and there.
But suddenly, all light vanished as he was swept up into Naomi's arms.
"Oh, Jim! I'm so happy for both of you!"
Okay, the shuttle had just left earth's orbit and Jim was on board.
Naomi released him and knelt down in front of her son and kissed him. Which had the effect of wiping the dopey grin from his face and replacing it with a frown.
"Uh, Mom? You're not - mad?"
"Well, mad isn't the right word, honey. Disappointed that it took this long, after all, you two have been living together for three years and it's like you purchased the dimmest bulb in the store, you know? But at long last, love!" She turned to Simon and asked, "Simon, am I right?"
Banks looked at his new love and shrugged. What could he say? Wasn't she always right?
"Absolutely, Naomi. My god, Jim, you're a detective! And you, Sandburg, an anthropologist, an observer of human nature, and soon to be a detective. Tsk-tsk."
Somehow, Blair knew this was all his mother's fault. But at the moment, he couldn't have cared less. He looked at Jim and his heart tripled its rate and his breathing quickened as he realized he really wanted to get to the possessing part.
But then the absurdity of the fact that what he'd done wrong was not the falling for the guy thing, wasn't even the falling for a cop thing, or even becoming the cop thing but that, according to Simon and his mother, he hadn't coupled with Jim Ellison much sooner! And that made him angry. Because they were right, but damn, who's life was it anyway?
He stood up and faced his mother.
"Okay, I think I've had it here. Simon, I respect you a great deal. You've been very patient all these years and I don't mind in the least that you kissed my mother, I think you make a great couple," he was interrupted by his mother thanking him. After throwing her an dirty look, he continued.
"BUT, what happens between Jim and I is our business. Mom, you've been out of line all day, and I for one, don't appreciate it. I'm twenty-nine years old and my life, my sex life, is exactly that - MINE. What I do with my life, is mine to.... do.....with. Is that clear? Mom? Simon?"
At two dumbfounded looks, he nodded. "I guess it is. Jim, you mentioned something about a celebration dinner? Why don't you and Simon get it started? Simon, you will stay, right?"
Simon nodded dumbly.
"Great. Mom, while they get started, why don't you help me to my room?"
If Jim was surprised by the sudden change in the man whose mouth he'd so recently invaded, he gave no sign. He just nodded, motioned for Simon to follow him, and together, they headed into the kitchen.
Blair started slowly toward his room, Naomi beside him. Once inside, he sunk down on his bed with a sigh.
"Honey? Is there anything I can do?"
The effects of the kiss were finally wearing off and the pain in his back was making itself known again.
"Mom, don't ask. I might actually tell you."
"Blair, please don't be mad. You know I only want your happiness."
"Please tell me you're not going the I only want what's best for you route? And when did you start becoming a mother?"