If You Go Down To The Woods Today, Are *You* In For A Big Surprise!

By K9

It was a sun shiny day, decided Winnie the Pooh, as he prepared his home for the party. He busied his little bear self trying to make everything *just* so; it wouldn't do for his bear friends to think he wasn't capable of organising a little party, now would it?

  Soon his humble little home would ring with the sound of bear laughter, and the whole forest would know that Pooh was throwing a party. He hugged himself with joy, and did a little dance, he was *so* excited!

  "Hmmm," hummed Pooh as he glanced around the room at all the goodies he had collected for the festivities, and ticked things off on his little bear paw. "Hunny...lots of hunny!" he chuckled as the twenty temptingly unopened jars almost whispered to him of what lay within, "Hmm, now Pooh, *concentrate*." He screwed up his eyes, and tried not to think of all that sweet, warm, honey almost in his grasp. "Let's see, is everything here? Hunny...condoms...hunny...lube....hunny...nipple clamps....hunny...cock rings...hunny..."



  First to arrive as usual was Big Ted; Playschool had let him out early it seems, so he'd decided to arrive first.... so he said.

  "That's a big problem for you, isn't it Ted?" Pooh smirked as he took Ted's hat, and scarf, hanging them on the little hook by the door.

  "What do you mean by that?" Ted huffed.

  "Oh, just a rumour I heard," Pooh replied, innocently.

  "Fucking *Bungle*," Ted spat angrily, his curly mohair fur almost straightening, and rising like the hackles of an angry dog. "You have *one* bad night with that slut, and he gets it around that you misfire all the time!"

  Pooh wrinkled his nose, and padded his feet anxiously, "Oh, don't take it to heart, Ted. We all understand. Have a hunny bap!"

  Ted's eyes narrowed slightly, "Is Issi Noho coming today?" he asked as casually as he could.

  "Oh yes, Issi never misses one of my 'dungeon' parties," Pooh trilled, "He's a fully qualified Dom now, you know?"

  "He *is*?" Ted's mouth dropped open, and he licked his lips.

  "Oh yes, he was on the cover of 'Leather Bear' last month!"

  Ted sat down on the small chair by the window, and sighed, "He's a hot bear, huh Pooh?"

  "Scorching!" Pooh grinned mischievously, as he scooped a handful of honey out of a jar, and smeared it on a sesame seed bap. "Did you hear about poor Paddington, getting arrested for prostitution? Who'd have thunk it, Paddington a rent bear."

  Ted 'humphed', "He's a high class rent bear, though," he reminded Pooh, "He has clients who *aren't* fur bound mammals!"

  "No shit?" Pooh dropped onto the chair in shock, "Humans? You mean he's into bestiality?"

  "Disgusting isn't it? I couldn't handle the sweaty, clammy, hairless bodies myself. Nothing to hang onto, if you know what I mean?" Ted humped his hips in a vain attempt to illustrate his point.

  Pooh fanned himself with his furry little paw, and reached for a hunny bap.

  Hunny was *so* good for shock.

  "I have to say, I don't know how Sooty lives with having humans so 'close.'" Pooh shuddered, "He wrote an article for 'Fisters Weekly' about how to 'Make a human your friend, and confidante,' but I don't think I could do that."

  Suddenly, a knock at the door brought a halt to the conversation. As Pooh struggled to answer it, honey dripping from his little paw, he squealed with glee at the sight that met him, as the old oak door swung open.

  "Teddy!" Pooh trilled, hurling himself into the paws of the large, slightly greying bear, "Oh my, it's so good of you to come! Is Andy Pandy with you?"

  "No, not today," the old bear boomed, "He's having a 'donor day' with Looby Lou. She's talked him into fathering a baby for her, and Hamble. So, I left them, and their turkey baster to it, and decided to come and party."

  Pooh padded his little feet, and ushered Teddy into his home. It was *so* exciting that a bear like Teddy would grace one of *his* parties!

  An hour later, Pooh's little home was jam packed with bears, and their furry brethren. Everyone who was anyone was tied up, tied down, straddled, manacled, or bound, right there in his little house.

  Rupert was performing on the kitchen table, his familiar yellow checked scarf, expertly binding a squealing Care Bear to the table legs, as he humped blissfully at a furry little rump, whilst holding on to that cute little bobtail.

  Bungle was being pleasured by two frantically whistling Clangers, and this time, he'd remembered not to sit down suddenly, lest another one get stuck in an inconvenient place.

  When Paddington had eventually showed up, he'd found himself to be guest of honour, and finally struck up a threesome with Uncle Bulgaria, and Orinoco....discovering to his utter delight, what it was *really* like to be 'wombled.'

  Glancing around at the frantic coupling, and sighing at the sound of joyful grunts, Pooh padded his little feet in ecstasy at yet another successful Bare Bear Bash.

  He chuckled at the sight of Big Ted in his leather harness, being whipped by Issi Noho, until the kapok spilled from his furry little rear.

Little Ted was watching from the comfort of the sofa, whilst receiving oral sex from one of My Little Ponies, making Pooh wonder why he was called 'Little' Ted at all?

  Hugging himself, and tugging gently on his nipple ring, Pooh congratulated himself on another success, and decided that the only way to celebrate, was to crack open a pot of extra sweet hunny. The Soup Dragon had invited Pooh to partake in a little pre-sex rimming competition, and a smear of his best hunny would be just the thing to ensure that he won, especially since his fellow competitor was a Clanger, who already had the advantage of a long nose, and seriously tractable tongue.

  Outside, the sun was setting, the birds were flying back to their nests for the night, woodland creatures skittered through the undergrowth, returning to their homes until sunrise, and Paddington was just tearing open his fifteenth box of condoms.

  All was well in the enchanted wood, and they all screwed happily ever after....


The End